Geek Mom & Family

Happy Mother’s Day to all of my fellow moms — especially those who are geeky, or who are raising geeky children.

I know Mother’s Day marketers would like me to think I deserve “stuff” today. Gifts of jewelry, flowers, perfume, etc. And perhaps some mothers really DO want breakfast in bed and lots of extra togetherness with the children.

I’m not there yet.

Make no mistake — I do love my children. I’m glad to be a mother! They’re with me every day, every night, and extra on the weekends and during school vacations.

Mother’s Day? I don’t need expensive stuff. I don’t need extra togetherness. What would I like?

Mother’s Day Off.

Ta-daa! It’s a new holiday! For those of us moms who are still surrounded by children, who still have them attached to us by breastfeeding or diapering or night terrors or “Mommy, carry me.”

For those of us who can’t sit on the toilet for a few minutes without being interrupted or having little fingers and notes being pushed under the door…

For those of us who spend all of our time at home caring for them, helping with homework, picking up toys and laundry and school papers and sports equipment…

For those of us who cook three different dinner entrees every day because the kids have food allergies to different ingredients…

For those of us who love our children, love being mothers, but just need a little break…

Mother’s Day Off!

I suspect I’ll crave the “traditional” Mother’s Day togetherness when my kids are older, more self-sufficient, and less constantly in my hair. But for now, I wouldn’t mind having a one day vacation from all of that intimacy.

So I hope you have a wonderful Mother’s Day, no matter how you celebrate it. You are appreciated. Keep up the great work!

ChoreMonster.com is an online system of chore assignments and rewards. It lets parents assign chores for kids by choosing from the default list or adding customized tasks. Each chore can be customized by due date, frequency, and points awarded.

Each child gets his own account, where the chores and rewards are presented in a colorful, easy-to-use interface. Kids can view assigned chores, check them off when they’re done, and see how many points they have earned. When they’ve saved enough points, they can redeem points for parent-defined rewards.

My kids have been using ChoreMonster for a couple of days now, and they’re still in the “this is so cool” phase. They enjoy suggesting chores and rewards for me to add to the system. They’re accumulating points and saving up for the big rewards (playdate with a friend, doughnuts, and a trip to the children’s museum, to name a few).

I like ChoreMonster because the kids go to the computer to see what they can do to earn points and help out around the house. This cuts down on the number of times I hear “Mom!” during the afternoon, which is nice. It also reduces the number of requests I get for treats and things, because they know how many points they need to save before they can be rewarded with something special.

We’ll see how they continue using ChoreMonster. Usually, they’re excited about any new chore system for about 1 week, and then they’re back to dreading chores. Maybe the combination of the computerized format, the scorekeeping, and the rewards-for-points system, will encourage them to stay with the ChoreMonster program! It’s kind of like a game!

ChoreMonster.com is still in beta mode, but the developer has given me an invitation code to share. If you’d like to give the free ChoreMonster system a try, just visit ChoreMonster.com and enter geekmom in the code field at the top of the page. Then follow the instructions to confirm your account.

Let me know what you think of the system. What kind of chores and rewards will you include in your family’s assignments? Do your kids do chores more willingly when it’s kind of like a game?

Grandpa, between his sister and his wife

Happy Veterans’ Day

! I always think about my grandfather on this day. He died a few years ago, and I neverheard him talk about his war experiences. He fought in World War II and the Korean War.

He made it home alive, raised children, worked hard, retired, and celebrated 50 years of marriage. During his long life, he shared some wise and funny sayings with us. Here are a few of my favorites:

• “Clean your plate.”
• “Gettin’ old is hell.”
• “I’ll give you 45 minutes to cut that out.” (During a shoulder massage.)
• “You can curl ‘em, braid ‘em, or split ‘em. Just don’t pull them out!” (When we would comb the few hairs he had left on his head.)
• “Gives the mosquitoes a place to skate.” (On being bald.)
• “What, honey? I don’t hear so good anymore. I don’t smell so good, either.”

I would have liked to hear about his days in the military, but he didn’t want to talk about that. I appreciate and respect his service, and I honor him by sharing these memories today.

Thank you, Grandpa. And thanks to all the people who have served our country to protect our freedom and preserve our safety!

My daughter is 6 years old. She is under the impression that aging corresponds with “getting bigger.” At her age, that’s true!

On the other hand, my husband and I joke around that I’m shrinking. I’m only 5 feet tall, and the last time we marked our heights on the wall, I was 1/4 inch shorter than last time. I tell my kids it’s because they’re wearing me down as they get older.

Anyway, my sweet baby girl gave me her thoughts on the “getting bigger” vs. “shrinking” processes my body is going through. Here’s what she said:

Daughter: “Mom, I think you’re all done getting bigger now.”

Me: “Really? Ok.”

Daughter: “Yeah! And now you’re shrinking!” <giggle giggle giggle>

Me: “I’m shrinking?!” <hahahaha>

Daughter: “Well, except for your this part –” <opens arms wide to point at my midsection> “YOUR TUMMY!”

Go ahead and laugh. I may be losing height, but for the record, I’m also working on reducing the “tummy” area. Aren’t kids hilarious?!

"I'm bored."

It’s been a while since I posted about my work at Squidoo. Well, I just finished a brand new page over there, all about how to keep kids from being bored. I worked on it all afternoon, because I was thinking of ways to keep my own kids from complaining, and I figured I’d put it into a nice, pretty, organized page, so other people could use the ideas, too.

When I was a kid, my parents would send us outside at the beginning of summer vacation and call us back just before school started. Okay okay, maybe it wasn’t quite like that. But it seemed like we spent almost every daylight hour outdoors. Any complaint of boredom was met with suggestions of either household chores or garden tending, which motivated us to find our own activities.

I guess children today don’t get much practice being bored. They need help coming up with things to do. Remembering the things I did as a child (no cable TV or video games!) inspired me to put together a really long list of ideas for my own kids. Some of the activities are fun and games, and some are little chores. They’re mostly free and non-electronic. They might be considered old-fashioned, which means they will seem brand-new to our modern youngsters!

If you have kids (or grandkids, neighborhood ruffians, visiting relatives, etc.) who are driving you crazy with a chorus of “I’m boooooored” and “There’s nothing to do!” then check it out. Boredom Busters: 100+ Ways to Keep Kids Busy When They’re Bored.

If you have some great ideas, please leave a comment and share! Cheers!

photo by John Morgan, used under a Creative Commons license

Well, here in Colorado, we had an amazingly warm December with a green/brown Christmas. I knew we’d get our winter weather eventually, and it has arrived during the last few weeks. It’s beautiful, as long as we don’t have to work outdoors. My kids have had some snow days lately, and today they were back at school, despite their hopes that the six inches of fresh snow would cause another cancellation…

Snowy trees in the front yard

Today, my husband worked from home, so he didn’t have to drive on the snow and ice. On the other hand, I had to drive my kids to and from school. The neighborhood roads are still covered with several inches of leftover, frozen slush, topped with the fresh snow we got last night. My minivan is pretty reliable, but it’s not all-wheel drive, and there’s a bit of a snow barrier at the end of the driveway, piled up by the snow plow. Can you picture the scene? Here’s what happened…

I was leaving to retrieve my third grader this afternoon, and as I went out the door, had this conversation with Hubby… Enjoy.

Me: I’m leaving. I’ll be back in a few minutes.
Hubby: What are you wearing on your feet?
Me: Birkenstocks. I’m not getting out of the car.

Hubby: What if you get stuck in the snow?
Me: Then I’ll call you to come rescue me. Don’t jinx me!
Minutes later, I got stuck at the bottom of the driveway and had to call Hubby to dig/push my van out of the snow bank.

We had a giggle over this… Hope you laughed, too. Stay warm!

Well, our whole family has been pretty much quarantined in our home for the better part of a week, with suspected H1N1 “swine flu.” We’re okay, so don’t panic. It’s not fun, but it’s manageable. It comes with a fever, so nobody can go to school or work, which means even my hubby has been stuck in the house.

Today, it finally got to him. After trying to sit on the couch and rest, puttering around the house a bit, doing some computer work from home, and despite his aches and cough, he couldn’t take any more family togetherness.

“Honey, I’m going to Ace [our local hardware store]. I’m going crazy with cabin fever.”

I wonder what he’ll come home with. He didn’t really need anything from the hardware store, but that’s where he wanted to go. I suggested he look for an outdoor black light to illuminate the fluorescent spider webs he has draped across the front of our house.

Who knows what he’ll find? It’s kind of like a candy store for a guy who hasn’t been out of the house in days, smothered by wifely TLC and home-from-school kids who are completely bored. Or like a doughnut shop. If I could run away to escape cabin fever, maybe I’d go to Krispy Kreme!

I know he appreciates what I do at home while he’s at his nice downtown office with grown-ups who blow their own noses and such. But maybe our week with the flu will remind him how lucky he is when he gets to leave the house to go to work. AND that he has a wife who stays home to take care of the kids and all their goop.

I love you, Sparky!

P.S. Avoid influenza! Wash your hands! Just a little Public Service announcement.

We have three kids, among whom allergies to all common household pets are represented. Aside from the allergy problems, we like the idea of having a pet, but not the idea of cleaning up after another little critter.

So last week, I made a brilliant decision and brought home the perfect pet for our family. Drum roll, please…

Meet our new iRobot Dirt Dog sweeper! It’s furless, doesn’t eat or poop, and cleans up after the humans in our home! Show me a real pup that does all that!

It works pretty well so far. We picked up the toys, socks, and LEGO pieces, got the loose cords off the floor, charged it up and pushed the button. Vroom vroom! Off it went, circling around, criss-crossing the room, navigating around table legs and fearlessly plowing under the couch. Amazing!

It ran for about an hour and then gave a little whistle to let us know it was finished. I didn’t expect it to do as good a job as it did. If we hadn’t been so excited to see the Dirt Dog in action, I would have thought to take before and after photos.

Anyway, I’m thoroughly pleased with our little pet. Now all we need is a good name. Let me know what you come up with.

I’ve been awarded Mother of the Year! It must be true, because I saw it on the internet… Well, okay. I’m not really that great of a mother. How bad is it that my idea of a nice Mother’s Day would be to spend it alone, without my kids? (I’m half-serious.)

Okay, that sounds terrible. But before you judge me, I dare you to walk a mile in my flip flops, wearing my baggy “yoga pants” (mom code for “it’s too hot for sweatpants, but I have to cover up my unshaven legs”), a faded and spit-up stained maternity shirt (even though you haven’t been pregnant in years), and bad bed head, with three kids pulling on your collar and hanging onto your arms and repeating an unsynchronized and dissonant chorus of “mom mom mom” in your ears until you can’t hear yourself think… Whoa! Deep breaths.

I know I’m not the only one out there who could stand a little quiet time.

One of my real Supermom friends sent me a link to a personalized Mother of the Year video, and I had to share it with my fellow moms, geeks, and everybody out there who has a mom. Happy Mother’s Day to all the mothers out there, Super and less-than-super. Someday, we’ll miss the “mom mom mom” noise, and all the other messy, fun, unpredictable stuff that comes with motherhood. And just for the record, I love my kids more than life. I’d just like to have the bathroom to myself for a few minutes.

I love my family! And I love to cook. Check that. I used to enjoy cooking. Or… I enjoy cooking for people who will eat and appreciate whatever I prepare. Unfortunately, that is not the situation in my home these days.

Two of my three children have or had food allergies, which made feeding times challenging when they were toddlers. My oldest (now 9) was allergic to lots of things, including dairy products, tomato, citrus, strawberries, soy, peanut butter… Just about “everything.” My second (now 7) was allergic to wheat. The set of foods that they both could and would eat was extremely small.

Mercifully, the youngest (just turned 4) doesn’t have any food allergies. Hallelujah!

To make a long story short, what started out as cooking to accommodate the kids’ allergies and prevent anaphylaxis, has developed into a habit of me running a Denny’s in my own kitchen. I’m like a short-order cook behind the counter. One wants macaroni without cheese (he’s allergic to cheese), the other wants French toast (he could eat macaroni, but won’t), and the Hubby prefers a normal meal, but nothing with peas, beans, or potatoes.

Ding! Order up!

Do you see why I’m going insane?! Every day, every meal, I’m running around the kitchen. Water boiling, toast toasting, microwave nuking, etc. Kiss my grits! (Flo, the sassy waitress at Mel’s Diner in the sitcom “Alice,” remember?)

I finally came up with an idea to make things a little bit easier on myself. It’s been in effect for a grand total of two days, but it’s working pretty well so far. In case there are any other overworked, kitchen-weary parents out there, I thought I’d share my solution.

At dinner on Sunday, I told the crew that I wasn’t going to take special orders any longer. I assigned Hubby and the kids the task of agreeing on five dinners that they would ALL eat. If this sounds ridiculous to you, you must have an easy family to feed, because it was no easy project for my bunch.

After about 30 minutes of lively discussion, they had assembled this list:

• Pizza night
• Taco/Nacho night
• Spaghetti and breadsticks night
• Snack/Buffet night (fruit, cheese, yogurt, bread, etc.)
• Grill night (burgers, brats, etc.)

Those five things will be rotated each week, and on the other two days, we’ll have leftovers or something special.

So that’s the plan. I’m feeling saner already. I went grocery shopping today and bought everything I’ll need for the rest of the week. And the ritual of 5:00 dinner panic has come to an end. Let’s hope they still like pizza a month from now. Cheers!