Nighttime toilet tip
If you've been following me on Twitter (GeekMomMashup), you've already heard this story. But for the rest of you, I thought it would be worth repeating, because it is pretty funny! Well, funny in a dark, creepy way... muah-ha-haah!
Last week, my six year-old son woke me up in the middle of the night. It must have been about 2:30 AM. As long as I was up, I figured I'd make a pit stop. So I shuffled to the bathroom, where I debated with myself over turning on the light.
My internal dialogue went something like this:
"Its not pitch dark, and I know where the toilet is. The light will be too bright, and it will hurt my eyes, and make it harder to go back to sleep."
"But what if there's a spider in the toilet? You know how I always have that in the back of my mind."
"There's not going to be a spider in the toilet. You worry needlessly, and there's never a spider in the toilet!"
"Well, there's hardly ever a spider in the toilet, and there's probably not a spider in this toilet right now. Fine."
So I left the light off and walked to the toilet. Before taking a seat, I glanced down into the bowl. I noticed a dark spot on the inside of the bowl. Above the water line, below the rim. Hmmm. What could that be? Better turn on the light.
I flipped the switch, squinted, and walked back to the toilet. I peered into the bowl again, and saw a nickel-sized, black, slightly hairy, spider! I'd almost sat on the toilet with that spider in there! What if I hadn't noticed it, and it had jumped onto my bare bottom?! What if it had bitten me? What if it had gotten stuck in my underwear?
I quickly flushed it down and did my thing. Afterwards, I thought I should have taken a photo, but it was too late. The moral of this story: There's probably not a spider in the toilet, but there could be one... Remember this the next time you need to "go" in the dark!
{ 22 comments… read them below or add one }
*snort*
least you don’t live in texas. we had a couple of black widows in the house - and they like doing sneaky things!
enders last blog post..BFF
@ender: I think black widows would be more like ninja spiders in the toilet. This guy wasn’t really trying to hide, so I was lucky that I saw it right away!
So, this will sound a little odd coming from the environmentalist blogger, but if you want to leave the light off and not worry about the spiders, flush first - and last.
It’s probably a wash anyway (pardon the pun) - use a little more water, or use a little more electricity… up to you, but you’ll end up flushing anyway if there IS a spider in there.
Namaste,
A. Caleb
At least you are not a guy.
Turning on some sort of light is mandatory!
(Get a night light and use that instead of a real, bright light.)
Paul Eilerss last blog post..A Simple Cure For Daytime Fatigue
Oh, no! No! No! I have never considered a spider in my toilet. Until now. From this day forward, the lights go ON!
Hey,
That reminds me of the time my uncle came home late at night, took off his clothes, and went to sit down on the bed… that wasn’t there because my aunt had re-arranged the furniture in the bedroom that day. LOL
Thankfully, here in Britain the spiders don’t have strong enough jaws to bite - welll with the exception of the little zebra spider and that’s more of a nibble!!! I’m so glad that I don’t have to think about spiders … as I too, sometimes, leave the light off!
Pollys last blog post..Crackin’ crop
Wow, that wasn’t what I was expecting. I was anticipating another, “Leave the toilet seat down lesson” for us men.
Beau71s last blog post..Website Stalking
You know, the average person eats about 9 spiders while they are sleeping over the course of their life. Chew on that one.
BigPappas last blog post..NY Comcast To Block Child Pornography
Gee - thanks Geekmom! There’s a lovely image to have during my night time trips to the bathroom.
Allow me to repay the favor…
When I was a child, my father opened the lid of the toilet to discover a drowned rat.
Honest.
You’re welcome.
You guys are great. I bet we could put together a whole book of what funny stuff happens in the dark at home. @BigPappa, one of my college roommates always used to say that, but I never believed her. Maybe… @Grandmother Wren, eeeeeeew! @Kathy, sorry to have given you one more thing to worry about.
Hey, maybe the lighted peepee target projector (to help my boys with their aim) would also help with nighttime spider threat identification! Somebody get busy and invent that thing, please!
Heya GeekMom,
That is really strange, the one night you had that mental struggle of if there was or wasnt one… and there was.
But… look on the bright side (no pun intended) it didn’t jump on to ya.
Perhaps a night light for the bathroom in future methinks might make it a little less hard on the eyes at night too.
Stuart
Being a mom of young ones I am up alot in the dark of night. I go all the time in the dark and I never thought a thing of it. Now it is all ruined for me, and I will have to turn on the light and hurt my eyes.
background checks blogs last blog post..Mistruths on Resumes
I’ve never really minded spiders cos they keep down the numbers of flies, which I don’t like at all. I’m one of those people who catches any wandering spiders in a glass and pops them outside. Of course, I live in the UK where a brush with a spider doesn’t present the possibility of losing a limb or possibly your life!
hahahaaaaa. Hilarious in a terrifying sort of way.
AAAAAAAAACK!
I NEVER turn on the light! Maybe I’ll start, LOL.
We have two things in common: 6 year old boys that wake up in the middle of the night and toilet-spider fear. Trust that intuition, right?
BarkingDogShoess last blog post..Comfortable Shoes for Bunions
Lol, put me on the list of people you’ve freaked out! I won’t ever be able to pee in the dark again for fear that a spider will attack.
Oh, I so do this when I have to visit the toilet at night. But instead of spiders I’m worried about scorpions. So, in the end, the light always gets turned on.
waterroses last blog post..Tatting is not a Lost Art Challenge!
OMG, I have done both turn the lights on and leave them off. I have never worried about spiders in the toilet until now. I know there are spiders in the bathroom because my oldest daughter saw one and then would not go. I have sat down on the toilet when the hubby left it up and I have sat down on the toilet when the seat was down. Can’t win. I do however turn the light on in the shower, (it’s like a little night lite) so it doesn’t hurt my eyes. Whew! You are right Geekmom, we all could write a book on this stuff. Did you hear when I went into the men’s bathroom? Go check it out @ http://www.myphysiqueinc.blogspot.com
Titled: “Which one am I”
also checkout http://physiqualicious.com
Pkayfits last blog post..Which One Am I?
LOL! Talk about a woman’s six sense. It couldn’t be more accurate. Luckily the other side of your internal dialogue didn’t win by telling you to just forget about the dark spot.
Here in South Africa we have a huge hairy beast of a spider called a Rain Spider (AKA Huntsman Spider). They have long spindly legs, look like they are wearing a fur coat, and run like the wind. The smallest one I have ever seen was about 5″ in diameter.
In the wee hours one morning my dog decided he urgently needed to go outside to pee. Without my glasses (I am terminally near-sighted) and in the dark, I padded out to the dining room to open the patio door for him. I reached up to pull down the deadbold holding the French doors shut and my knuckles grazed something furry. I squinted and looked and, in the dim glow of a nearby streetlight I was able to make out the shape of a huge rain spider hunkered down next to the deadbolt.
I almost died on the spot. I started shrieking which woke my husband waken from a sound sleep and made my him think we had burglars or something. Next thing I know, he comes rushing naked into the dining room carrying his 5-cell maglight flashlight (doubles as a formidable club) ready to defend me. The poor dog peed on the floor then crawled under the dining table where he hide, quaking and whimpering, until we got the situation under control (translation: hubby killed the spider, wrapped it in tissue and flushed it down the loo).
And to think, in California I was freaked out by those little bitty black widows and brown recluse spiders!
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